Happy Mother's Day!

It's my first Mother's day!

Caleb is relaxing in his swing, happily admiring himself in the mirror (it's one of his favorite things to do LOL). Ethan went to the grocery store to do the shopping so I'm having some me time on the couch.

Looking back on my old blog posts and remembering the past couple months, I have to say that becoming a mom was a tough transition for me. It was a big change and I wasn't fully prepared..maybe you can't really ever be fully prepared for the enormity of having a baby. It's a lot different than what I expected, and I wasn't ready for my life to fully revolve around someone else.

As hard as those first few weeks were, and as stressed out as I was, it was obviously all worth it to have my beautiful little boy. Also, the adjustment, while difficult for me, happened pretty quickly and I feel so much more comfortable in my new role now than I did just a few short weeks ago. I think around 5 or 6 weeks was the turning point for me, when the balance shifted from being overwhelmed much of the time, to enjoying being with Caleb. That's probably due to a combination of factors - not least of which is Caleb sleeping longer stretches at night.

Now I can honestly say that I am loving being a mother. Every day gets a little bit better, and a little bit more fun! I love watching him grow, and he grows so fast! He seems to be constantly changing and always learning new things. Every time he smiles, I feel so happy for him. His happiness is my happiness too, and that's a wonderful thing. I am so blessed to have him in my life. It doesn't hurt that he is adorable. I literally think he is the cutest baby ever! ;)

So even though it's Mother's Day, and of course Ethan has a ton of great stuff planned for me to enjoy today, I feel like I already have the best gift.

I should give Ethan a little shout out though - he is already going out of his way to make it a great day. First he let me sleep in with my baby boy while he cleaned the whole downstairs. When I got up he had a nice card waiting for me, and he got me two great presents - some new Pyrex glass dishes and some covered casserole dishes that I've been wanting for a long time. Then he made me breakfast and helped give Caleb a bath. Now he's out at the grocery store doing the shopping while I relax at home. Later today, we are going to one of our favorite places, the Salish Lodge (we got engaged and married there) where I will get a facial and then we'll have dinner in their restaurant. This is going to be our first date out without the baby. I'm so spoiled! :)

So happy Mother's Day to everyone out there, whether you are a mother or you just have a Mother. I hope you find a way to make this day special for you and yours.

Sleep! Glorious Sleep!

Caleb started sleeping through the night!!

Sleeping through the night in baby world means at least 6 hours in a row. That's definitely good enough for me right now. We started putting the little monkey in his crib this week on the advice of the other parents in our parent's group. It made a huge difference in everyone's sleep! Caleb immediately went from 'waking up' every 2 or 3 hours to sleeping 4 to 5 hour stretches. Last night, he slept from 10:00 to 5:00am!

I put waking up in quotes because I have realized that what was actually going on was that I was hearing Caleb's normal sleepy fussing and thinking that he needed to get up, so I was actually taking him out of his bassinet and giving him a bottle. With him in the bassinet right next to me, it was very difficult for me not to respond to every little grunt. I didn't really realize that the grunting and fussing is just what he does when he's sleeping. Also, he didn't go back to sleep very quickly after putting him in the bassinet so I would stay awake for 30-45 minutes after giving him a bottle trying to rock him and then eventually putting him in bed with me. The whole process meant mom was getting virtually no sleep at night.

In his crib, for some reason he seems to fall right back asleep without much interference from me, even after his 5am feeding. I have to admit, the transition to the crib was rough for me. I missed him a lot, especially the first few nights, and picturing him alone in his nursery was almost too much and I was very tempted to go get him. Also, he has a very quiet cry, so I was paranoid that I wouldn't hear him crying and he would think I didn't love him (haha I know, I know). I do have a baby monitor...which I sat staring at most of the night the first couple nights, waiting for any sign of distress. It has gotten easier though, once I realized that Caleb was not traumatized from being in his crib. In fact, he almost seems happier in the morning after waking up from a long sleep. I do miss him though. And I admit that I still put him in bed with me after his early morning meal, after Ethan goes to work. I can't give up my snuggle time yet.

So it's gotten easier putting him in his crib, and I do like getting more sleep at night. Last night I got 6 hours almost in a row (I woke up a few times, but was able to fall back asleep pretty quickly), and let me tell you it makes a huge difference in my mood and energy level.

Another thing that's made this a great week is that our nanny Hanna started moved in. She's a tremendous help to me during the day. Just having someone else around to watch the baby for an hour or two at a time so I can have a chance to shower, fold my own laundry, do the dishes, etc, makes me feel so great. Also, it's nice to just have some company during the day. Hanna is really good with the baby, and also just generally very easy to live with and have around the house, so we couldn't be more pleased with her. I know she's going to take great care of Caleb when I go back to work.

I have been making more of an effort to get out of the house (it's a lot easier to do that when I can shower in the morning :D ) and see people. I went to lunch with a friend last week, and we went to our parents group (PEPS - love it - highly recommend!) and I also took Caleb to a Tot Shabbat. Tot Shabbat was great. It's a Jewish Shabbat (Sabbath) Service just for kids and they sing Shabbat songs and drink grape juice and eat Challah bread. It was so cute watching all the other little kids sing songs and play together. I hope to have more opportunities to get Caleb involved in play groups and stuff like that. I think it will be a little tough for me, since I"m going back to work and most of that sort of thing is during the day, but I'm going to make it a priority to block off some of my schedule at least once a week or so for some type of group activity with Caleb, whether its a story hour or Tot Shabbat or whatever. I'm so lucky that I have the type of job that allows that flexibility, and I'm definitely going to take advantage of it.

I can't believe I only have 5 more weeks left before I go back to work. Time is flying by now...it's kind of bittersweet. Every day Caleb gets a little bigger and a little more interactive. He's already out of all of his newborn clothes and can only wear size 0-3. He also smiles a lot more now. We can count on several smiles a day, usually in the morning. He is concentrating better now, and follows toys and lights with his eyes. This week he started grasping at objects with his hands. I don't think he really does it conciously, but he'll definitely open and shut his fingers around almost anything in his range. It's amazing how quickly they change. Life is full of little tiny miracles these days. But while I can't wait to see what the next moment has in store, I can't help but realize that in the blink of an eye these tiny baby days will be over and he'll be crawling, then walking, and someday even driving, so sometimes I wish I could stop time and just keep him this way. :)

But I guess there's always more babies...hehe...Ethan better watch it or we'll end up like the Duggars!